"Hurry, hurry," is all I
can hear. I feel as if I am waking from a dream, and people are rushing
past me shouting, "Come on, man, hurry, it will start soon."
I feel I am awake now, so I go along
with all the people, but I wonder, `Where am I, and where is everyone going.'
I try to remember the last thing that happened. I can remember lying in
a bed, and then feeling very tired and my son slowly pulling the sheet
up over my face. Then my wife started crying, and a priest started to read
something from a small book. I had always wondered why he carried that
small book with him wherever he went. Then I felt very peaceful. It felt
as if I was slowly falling through soft white clouds, until now I hear
everyone shouting at me to hurry.
Everyone is rushing towards a large
building. As I join them I look at the people, and I notice they all seem
to be about the same age, and there are no old people or children. The
men appear to be about 30 and the women about 25, all much younger than
me. I am 74. As I enter the building I see my reflection in the glass door,
and I am surprised because I appear to be about 30 also !
"Where am I ?" I ask the
man next to me, "Is this Heaven ?"
"No," he laughs, and then
he says, "You must be new here."
"Well, I have never been here
before, so is this Hell, then ?" I ask, although I cannot believe
that it can be, because it seems to be such a nice place, where most of
the people seem very happy.
"No, my friend. This is Limbo-Land,"
he says. "Look, someone is getting up to speak. He will explain it
all to you."
The speaker starts by saying, "I
would like to welcome you all, especially all the new people from Earth-Life
who have just arrived here in Limbo-Land." Then he says, "Now
please shake hands with the person next to you. What do you feel ?"
I shake hands with the man, but I feel nothing, and my hand seems to go
right through him. The speaker explains, "Here in Limbo-Land we do
not have a real body you can touch, like we did in Earth-Life. Here we
just appear to have a body which looks like the one we had there, but mainly
so that we can recognise each other. That is why we can choose to appear
at the age we like best."
I wonder, 'If my body is not real,
then my brain cells cannot be real either, so how is it that I can remember
things ? This must just be a very bad dream after all.'
I continue listening to the speaker
and later he explains that memory is simply seeing what has happened in
the past. He continues, "The past is fixed, and we can do nothing
to change it, and so we can see it like reading from a history book. We
know the present, and we know that the present has developed from the past.
This is how we can make the connection and discover the past, like finding
the names of parents and then grandparents etc." He explains that
anyone can do this by thinking backwards, but it takes practice.
"When you can do this well you
will be able to find out everything that happened to you on Earth, and
then in the Life-Before that," he says. "When we were in the
Earth-Life, we could never find out anything about the Life-Before, but
now we can. However," he warns, laughing, "so can everyone else,
and they may find out things about you that you wish you had never done.
In Earth-Life we could tell lies and hide things, but you cannot do that
here." The speaker invites us to come again soon and learn more, and
then we all leave.
I wander around, hoping to meet someone
I know, and at last I see someone who looks familiar, but I do not recognise
him until he says, "Hello, don't you remember me ? I was your father
in the Earth-Life."
"Oh, yes," I say excitedly,
"I recognise you now, Father, although I never knew you when you were
as young as you look now." Then I remember something and say, "Oh,
don't you want to know what I have done with your name ?"
Father laughs and says, "No, a
name is not important, they are just words we use so that we know who we
are talking about."
"Oh," I ask, "do you
want me to call you 'Father' or use your proper name ?"
"You can do either," he says,
"but if you call me 'Father' it may help me to remember the good times
we had together in the Earth-Life. I am not very good at thinking backwards
yet. I still haven't even discovered what my name was in the Life-Before."
Father says he has been looking out
for me since he heard that I was coming to Limbo-Land, and he shows me
around.
"Can you see that long round wall with all those people leaning over
the edge ?" he asks. "That is the Arena. Let's go there and I
will show you."
We go to the wall and look over it.
I look down a long way and see clouds. Father says, "Look carefully
and you can see Earth under the clouds."
I look again and at last I can see
many places and people I remember from my Earth-Life. "Did you look
at me ?" I ask him.
"Yes, I watched you," he
says. I saw you at work, and with your wife and your children. I saw the
good things you did, and some other things, but usually I was proud to
see how you lived your life."
Then Father points to a lady. I recognise
her as a famous film star, and I see that she is getting undressed to take
a shower. Father asks, "Do you feel any different ?"
"No, why ?" I reply, "should
I ?"
"Would you feel the same if you
were still on Earth and you could see her now ?" Father asks, laughing.
Then I understand. Father continues, "Things are different here. Without
a real body, we can have no pain, or pleasure, from these things."
Then Father points to some people having
an argument. I recognise my son and his wife and I listen to what she is
saying, "Why won't you spend the money ? You're just as bad as your
father."
"I would be very angry with her
if I heard her say that about me when I was on Earth," I say, "but
it does not seem to worry me now. I wonder why that is, Father."
"Here in Limbo-Land we seem to
lose all our bad feelings," he explains, "maybe because there
can be no secrets here. Now we just have friendly feelings towards each
other. It took me a long time to understand what Earth-Life was for."
"Please tell me," I ask.
"First let me tell you about the
Life-Before," he says. "We were in the Life-Before for a very
long time, and there we could be good or bad, clever or lazy, kind or angry
or jealous and so on, to develop our character ready to go to Earth-Life.
Sometimes in Earth-Life people say that the character is our soul or our
spirit, but these are the same thing, although the word 'character' is
perhaps better because it does not give the idea of an object that needs
to be kept in a particular place. But whatever you call it, it is the part
of us which goes from one existence to the next."
"So then we go to Earth-Life,"
I say.
"Yes," he says, "but
Earth-Life is different. There we have a physical life, which, although
it is short, it means that our character can develop much faster, and in many
different ways. The whole purpose of
Earth Life is to improve ourselves, and we do this by learning to make
the right choices. Our life is full of choices, to give us the opportunity
to develop as much as possible."
"So what actually happens when
a person dies ?" I ask
"Listen, in Earth-Life it is the will
power of our character that controls the body we have, apart from the automatic
actions like breathing and so on," he explains. "But it is this
same body that also traps our character inside, and forces us to use our
mouth and ears and so on to communicate with other people. However, when
we die our character becomes free of our body."
"Where does our character go ?"
I ask.
"It does not go anywhere,"
he says. "It is rather like saying something on Earth. Where does
what we say go ? After death the character continues it's existence without
having to be kept in one place. That is the character that we bring with
us to Limbo-Land, and Limbo-Land is just the name for the next stage of
our development."
"I see. So here
we can choose to feel that we are very close to people on Earth, or a long
way from them. But why is it called Limbo-Land ? When I first came here
I wondered if I was in Heaven or Hell."
"Ha," laughs Father. "We
will have to wait a long time for that judgement, but this life is called
Limbo-Land because we are half way there, and not very much happens here,
while we wait for everyone to come from Earth-Life. We can still change
our character of course, but it takes longer now because we no longer have
a physical body. Here you will find many people who have deep regrets about
how they wasted their time on Earth."
"The idea of thinking backwards
to find what happened in the past is very exciting," I say. There
were many things I never understood when I was at college, particularly
the mathematics lectures."
"Ha," laughs Father. "It
will not work. You will not remember the words your lecturer said, only
your feelings about not being able to understand."
I go to the Arena many times and I
notice one woman who is always there, and often I think that she is looking
at me. I decide to talk to her and ask what she is doing.
She says, "I like trying to talk
to people in Earth-Life."
"Can you really talk to people
in Earth-Life ?" I ask. "I thought people came here just to watch."
"Yes, most people here are simply
watching their children and their friends, because talking to people is
so difficult." she says.
"How do they talk ?" I ask.
"Through people's dreams, I suppose."
"No," she says, "dreams
are too unreliable, everything is muddled up and any message would be distorted
and difficult to understand."
"All right, then what is the problem
?" I ask.
"Well," she says, "when
you were on Earth did you ever hear anything from anyone in Limbo-Land
?"
"No, I don't think so," I
reply.
"That is because you never listened,"
she says, laughing, but when she sees that I do not understand, she explains,
"Most people on Earth want to be busy for every minute of their life,
so they are never quiet enough to hear anything from here."
"How can they do that ?"
I ask. Then I say, "Is it like meditation, because here in Limbo-Land
we do not have a mouth and ears that work like they do in Earth-Life ?"
"Yes, that's right," she
says. "We concentrate the feelings in our mind to the person, and
when the person meditates they let their mind go empty, so it is clear
for them to receive the feeling from us."
"Is that how we are talking alone
to each other now ?" I ask.
"Yes," she says. "I
am concentrating my feelings to you now, so it is difficult for anyone
else to discover what my feelings are. It is rather like whispering to
someone in a crowded room on Earth."
"Okay, but can you receive feelings
back from people in Earth-Life ?" I ask.
"A few people here can, but first
the person in Earth-Life must hear us so that they know who to reply to.
That is why they can never call us first," she says, "although
some people in Earth-Life pretend that they can call people here first."
"Who have you tried talking to
?" I ask
"I have tried to talk to one of
my friends for many years," she says sadly, "but he has heard
me only once. On that day he was alone and quietly planning to do something
that I could see would be very dangerous, and I shouted as loudly as I
could to warn him. He turned round to see who had called his name. There
was no one near him, so I hoped he would ask who had called him, but he
didn't. If only he knew how to be quiet and listen, then I could tell him
about myself, and he could learn how we could talk to each other."
"So you knew him in the Earth-Life
?" I ask.
"No," she replies. "We
were best friends in the Life-Before. I went to Earth-Life about three
years before him, but we lived in different countries and so we never met
each other. I became so lonely, although then I did not know why of course.
You remember how everyone in Earth-Life tries very hard to live as long
as possible. Well, one day when I was twelve I became ill, and I didn't
care about my life, so I let myself die, and here I am."
"Is it easy for people in Earth-Life
to talk to people here ?" I ask.
"Yes, after they have heard us,
and understand what is happening," she says, "although it can
still be difficult for people on Earth to hear us, because, even if it
is quiet, they might think it is just an idea in their own mind."
"How can they know ?" I ask.
"If it is their own mind, they might think they are going mad."
"Yes, but do you remember when
you had a good idea ?" she asks, "did it come slowly or quickly
?"
"If I had to think about something,
the answer would come slowly," I reply, "but sometimes a good
idea would come in a flash."
"That is the difference,"
she explains. "Here in Limbo-Land we have no body and no mouth to
slow us down, so we can send our ideas, as you say, in a flash."
"So if someone on Earth gets an
idea very quickly, it must come from outside their body, maybe from here,"
I say, "but if the idea comes slowly, they know it is just their own
thinking."
"That's right," she says.
"I am sure people in Earth-Life
would want to ask lots of questions." I say.
"Of course, but they must realise
that we still know nothing about the future here, only the present, although
sometimes we can see things that will soon happen and try to warn people,"
she says. "Some people here can have a friend in Earth-Life who wants
to send a feeling to someone else on Earth. We can help them by receiving
their idea and trying to put it into the mind of the other person in Earth-Life."
"That would be very useful for
someone in Earth-Life !" I say.
"Yes," she says, "but
the most wonderful thing for us here is sharing the feelings of people
in Earth-Life."
"But why ?" I ask. "Everyone
here has lived on Earth, and anyway the people here can see everything
that happens in Earth-Life."
"Yes, but," she says excitedly,
"not everyone here has had all the experiences that you can have on
Earth. I left Earth-Life early, and so I missed many experiences. If someone
on Earth replies to me I can talk to them and they can let me share their
feelings. I would be able to tell my friend the things I missed in my Earth-Life,
and he could do new things and let me share his feelings. It would be wonderful
!"
"And you could share your feelings
with him too," I say.
"Yes," she says. "I
wanted to tell him about the things I have learned since I have been here,
especially the three duties, which would be a real shock to him."
"The three duties ?" I ask.
She laughs. "You had better learn
about them from one of the speaker's talks."
I leave her and wander around, looking
at the other people here. There seems little to do, except to listen to
the talks in the building, because I cannot find anyone else I knew in
my Earth-Life. I see a man sitting down, with his head in his hands. He
seems to be crying. I sit next to him and I listen to him saying to himself,
"What was the use of money ? Why did I waste all my time on Earth
in business just to get money. I never thought about the three duties."
I think, 'What are these three duties
?' and then I wonder, 'Perhaps they are to do kind things to people, to
have kind thoughts about people and to respect nature. Well, I think I
did those duties fairly well.' I ask the man if I am right.
The man turns to me and says, "No,
no. That's what I heard people say in Earth-Life too, although I never
took much notice, but it's more than that, much more."
While I am waiting for the next talk
in the building, I go to the Arena again, hoping that the lady I spoke
to before can explain about the three duties. I cannot see her, so I look
down at Earth. I see my son, and he has just finished the argument with
his wife. Later the lady comes up to me and I tell her about this.
"Ah," she says, "that
is what is so disappointing about being in Limbo-Land. Wherever we are,
we measure time by how long it takes to get things done, but here, without
a real body we can do so little. This means that something that takes only
a few minutes on Earth takes a few days here."
"That is strange," I say.
"We can send our thoughts faster because we do not have a body, but
now other things take longer."
Then I ask her, "Please tell me
about the three duties. When I first tried to find out about them, I thought
they must be to do kind things to people, to have kind thoughts about people
and to respect nature, but now I think there is more."
"What you have said is just part
of the first duty," she says, "which is to be a good person,
like all the great teachers on Earth have always told us."
"So the second duty is to care
for our children, I suppose," I reply.
"No," she says, "that
is still part of being a good person, because a good person will also be
a good parent and will raise good children. It is natural for parents to
look after their children, even the animals do that. No, the second duty
is to repay the debt."
"What debt ?" I ask. "I
was always careful to pay all my debts in my Earth-Life."
"No, it is not a debt of money,"
she says seriously. "We must all repay the loan we take out when we
start our Earth-Life. We must repay our parents for all the time and trouble
they took to raise us."
"Oh," I reply slowly, "but
how can we do this ? Often I was very naughty and I made my parents unhappy.
Even if I gave them all the things in the world, it could never undo the
pain I caused them."
She thinks for a moment and then she
says, "Yes, of course, and although we should respect our parents,
we do not have to repay them directly. We repay our parents in the same
way that they repaid their parents, not by giving things, but by doing
what they did. Do you understand now ?"
"Oh, I think so," I say.
"You mean that people can only repay this debt by raising children
of their own."
"That's right," she says,
sadly.
She can see that I look worried. "Do
people have any other debts to repay ?" I ask.
"Yes, of course," she says.
"Think of all the people who have ever helped you, friends, teachers
and even strangers. You will be very ungrateful if you never help other
people in the same way that you have been helped." She pauses and
then asks, "You have children. Do you think you did your second duty
?"
"Well, I think so," I say,
"maybe."
"You are luckier than me, then,"
she says, sadly. "I did not care about living, and I never had any
children and so I have failed my second duty. What was it like to raise
children ?"
"It was twenty, or maybe thirty
years, of hard work and worry," I say laughing, "but it was worth
it."
"When I came here someone told
me that raising children is the greatest adventure that Earth-Life can
offer," she says slowly, "much more than travelling or being
famous or doing something that has never been done before."
"The greatest adventure that Earth-Life
can offer ?" I ask. I think about this for a moment and then I say,
"Yes, I think it is. And now I can see why. I taught my ideas to my
children, and I can see that they teach them to their children, and to
theirs and so on. In this way my ideas, which are part of my character,
can live for ever."
"Yes," she says, and then
continues, "You said it was hard work and worry. What do you mean
about the worry ?"
"Well," I say, "I remember
one dark evening our daughter was late coming home from her weekly Girl
Guides meeting. She did not want us to bring her home anymore because she
was too old for that, and her friends would laugh at her. That evening
when she was late home we worried about all the bad things that could happen
to her, and we were so pleased when at last she come home."
"Why was she late ?" she
asks.
"Oh," I say laughing, "she
had just stayed at her friend's house to see some new kittens."
"Yes," she says slowly, "I
think you have done your second duty." Then she pauses and says, "I
am tired now. If you can come tomorrow, I will tell you what I know about
the third duty."
I leave her and wander around. I notice
a tall tower, and when I get there someone offers to show me around. I
follow the guide up to the top of the tower. I can see for a long way.
In one direction there are thousands of people a long way away, and they
all seem to be enjoying themselves. "Those people are still in their
Life-Before," says the guide. "They are happy because they are
looking forward to going to Earth. The clever ones are trying to guess
what it will be like, and some are boasting about what they will do when
they get there."
"I think they will have a surprise,"
I say.
The guide laughs and says, "Yes,
but of course they will forget all their plans and ideas when they get
to Earth-Life. They will be born as babies and their brain cells will be blank."
"Can we talk to people there,
like we can talk to people in Earth-Life ?" I ask.
"No," says the guide. "There
is no communication between us here in Limbo-Land and those in the Life-Before.
They are completely on their
own. We can see them, but they cannot see us. They know that they will
go to Earth, and then come here to Limbo-Land, but that is all."
I look in the other direction and ask,
"What is that dark mountain ?"
"That is the home of Dark-Force,
and all the people that follow those bad ideas," says the guide. "Take
my advice, keep away from there."
I look carefully and I can see some
large black birds flying around the mountain. I look beyond the mountain
and I see part of a large building. "What is that ?" I ask.
"That is the Judgement Hall that
is being built," he says.
"For the final ... ?" I ask.
"Yes," he says, "for
the Final Judgement, where our destiny is fixed forever, although I have
heard ..."
"What have you heard ?" I
ask.
"Oh, nothing really, just rumours.
Let's go down," he says.
Next day I go to the Arena again, but
I cannot see the lady I spoke to before. Suddenly all the people start
pointing up into the sky, and I see one of the large black birds I saw
from the tower. Someone shouts, "It's from the Dark Mountain !"
Someone else shouts, "Run ! It's a Dark-Force attack." and everyone
runs away from the Arena.
When I look back, I see the bird flying
back to the mountain. The lady I met before is at the Arena, but her face
is white, and she looks very worried. She tells me, "This could be
the start of a Dark-Force attack. There has not been an attack for many
years, but I suppose the peaceful days cannot last forever. Maybe some
really wicked person has left Earth-Life, and they are in the Dark-Mountain
preparing a lot of trouble for us."
She can see that I do not understand,
so she continues, "Here around the Arena is the peaceful part of Limbo-Land,
not like in the Dark-Mountain, where the people all hate us. That single
bird must have been a spy, but it may mean they plan to attack soon."
"But how can they attack ?"
I ask. "There can be no war here like there is in Earth-Life, because
nothing here is real. There can be no guns, and no-one can die."
"There is a continuous power struggle
here for control of people's minds," she says. "The fighting
will be in our minds. The Dark-Force will try to change our minds to follow
their bad ways. It is worse than fighting in Earth-Life, because there
is nowhere to hide here. The only way you can protect yourself is to keep
thinking about lots of little, unimportant things. If you try to think
about important things, there will be short periods when your mind is empty,
and then they can put their bad ideas into your mind."
"But surely afterwards I can change
the way I think, can't I ?" I ask.
"No," she says, "because
your character will change also, and you may then have a bad character
for thousands of years afterwards. You could lose all the good that your
character has developed since you started at the beginning of the Life-Before.
Please, do not try to fight back, just think about little, unimportant
things until the attack is finished."
"When was the last attack ?"
I ask.
"They try an attack every few
years," she says, "but they have not had control of the Arena
for a long time. That is what they really want. Before I came here, Dark-Force
had controlled the Arena for six years, while there was a terrible war
on Earth. They lost control about fifty years ago, and since then there
has not been a big war on Earth, even with all the terrible modern weapons.
That is why Dark-Force still wants to get control of it."
"Why is the Arena so important
to them," I ask.
"They want to control the Arena,
and all the people who can use it, so that they can make people in Earth
follow their bad ideas," she says.
"So they want to control people
like you, then," I say.
"Yes," she says, "but
please never think about me if there is an attack, or they may get you.
Only think of yourself."
I go back to the tower. I plan to climb
the tower and look towards the Black-Mountain, but the guide sees me coming
and calls, "Haven't you heard ? There is going to be a Dark-Force
attack, hide yourself !" and he runs away from the tower. Now he has
gone, I am free to climb the tower, but he may be right, and it may be
dangerous.
I decide to climb quickly, take a quick
look and come down again, but it is a silly thing to do. When I get to
the top of the tower I look towards Dark Mountain and I see hundreds of
black birds flying towards me. 'Oh dear,' I think, 'The attack has already
started.'
"Find the Arena Queen, find the
Arena Queen," is all I can hear as the birds come closer. There is
nowhere to hide so I start thinking of numbers, 1,2,3 ... The birds fly
past the tower towards the Arena, and I think I am safe. More birds are
coming but I am counting automatically now, 63,64,65 and my mind wonders,
'Perhaps the lady I met at the Arena is the Arena Queen they want.'
Suddenly I hear a shout, "Here
is someone who knows !" and then others shout, "Tell us where
she is."
Then they force me to go with them.
The Dark Force has set up a camp near the Arena, and several guards surround
me. One of them, who seems to be their leader, says, "You are our
prisoner," but I laugh to myself, thinking, 'I have no body. Are there
walls and doors and locks that can keep me in ?'
The guard leader says, "You must
be new to Limbo-Land. Our prison is not a prison of the body, it is a prison
of the mind. We keep your thoughts in, so that you cannot send your thoughts
to anyone outside." I feel cold, and I wonder how they can do this.
The guard leader reads my mind and says, laughing, "The guards listen
to all your thoughts, and then they think the opposite. If you think "red",
they think "not red", so that the thoughts that leave here cancel
each other, and the result outside is nothing - no message."
Another guard comes up to me and says,
"So. You know the Arena Queen. We have wanted to control that witch
for a long time, a very long time. Tell us where she is, and how she hides
herself."
"Why do you want her ?" I
ask.
"You must be new here," he
says, laughing. "We want to help the people still in Earth-Life, but
we need someone like her to help send our messages there."
"Lies !" I shout. "Your
ideas are bad for the people there, and you just want to stop her telling
people how bad your ideas are."
I start counting again, but the guard
reads my mind and says, "That will not save you, nor your precious
queen. Now tell us where she is, and how she hides herself !"
I start thinking of multiplication
tables, 2 x 2 = 4, 2 x 3 = 6, 2 x 4 = 8 and so on. Then I decide to try
thinking backwards. I think of all the things I can remember in my life,
and try to put them order, starting with the last. I think of my wife,
my grown up children and their children. Then I think of my children when
they were small, and my work. Next, before I was married, at university,
at school, at primary school. I remember purposely drawing lines nearly
horizontal and vertical when a student teacher asked us to draw them obliquely,
and the day the girl sitting next to me broke the mirror in my pocket,
what was her name, was it Barbara ?
I realise this is a very long thought,
and the guards will not be able to remember all of this to think of the
opposite, so maybe someone will know what I am thinking.
I remember running home after school
because I thought I could see my mother, and then realising that it was someone
else. I think of the story book with the brown cover that the girl next
door gave me when I was five. I think of my earliest memory, watching the
sunset when I went to the hospital to see my new baby brother. Then there
is nothing.
I try very hard, but it is like a wall,
I just cannot think through it. I hear one of the guards say, "He
has done well, but now he is up against the wall."
I try harder, and then, yes, there
is something. The wall seems to be breaking. Now I am in the open, and
someone comes up to me and shows me something written on a plate. I read
it and then he hides it. I think back farther. I must be in my Life-Before
now. There is a party, and everyone is wishing me a safe journey. Then
I think back farther to my friends. There is a lot of trouble and then I remember
a farewell party for
one of my friends who is leaving for Earth-Life, but suddenly my thoughts
are interrupted by the guards shouting, "We've got her ! We've got
the Arena Queen !"
'Oh, no,' I think, but sure enough,
here is the lady from the Arena. We are both prisoners together. She is
looking very disappointed, and she tries to smile, saying, "It is
not your fault. Don't worry."
I think, 'Why does she not seem to
be worried about being caught by her enemies ?' Then I think, 'Maybe she
has been working for Dark-Force all this time,' but she shouts, "Never,"
so loudly that I forget that idea.
"How did you get caught ?"
I ask.
"I will tell you later,"
she says, smiling a little, and now she does not look so worried about
being in this prison.
I ask her, "Maybe this is not
the best place, but since we may be here for some time, can you tell me
about the third duty ?"
"I'll tell you about all three
duties," shouts one of the guards. "She's probably told you that
the first one is to be good, well that's right. The first one is to be
good at looking after yourself, remember number one, always put yourself
first. Maybe she told you that the second one is to repay, well that's
right too. If someone does something to you, make sure you do it back to
them even harder. What did she tell you about the third one ?"
We say nothing.
"Oh, didn't she tell you ?"
asks the guard. "Well, take it from me, the third one is power, power,
power. It's the power of control that is important. Look at me. I've been
here for two thousand years. Do you know what I did ? I was a guard in
Earth-Life too. One day the king sent me to kill all the babies and small
children in a town. That's what I did. Now people read about it every year
in a famous book."
We are shocked, but the guard continues.
"When I got here, I knew there would never be any forgiveness, no
hope of Heaven for me, so I joined Dark-Force. Now we have fun with the
people in Earth-Life. What I like to do is to put a few ideas into someone's
mind, to make them forget something important, so that something big goes
wrong. Then they lose their temper, and I control them ! It's just like
being back on Earth again. I control everything, what they think, what
they say, what they do, but more than that, I can feel real things again.
Ah, that's the power, and that's what the third duty is, to get as much
power as you can."
I do not believe what the guard says
about the three duties, although I can believe what he said about his Earth-Life.
I realise that I still do not know what the third duty really is.
We have a new guard to look after us,
so I ask him, "Why did you join Dark-Force ?"
"Me ?" ask the guard. The
Arena lady and I both nod our heads.
"Well, I came from Earth-Life
about three hundred years ago. I tried to be a good person on Earth, and
I think I brought up my children well. After we had our children, many
babies in our village were born deaf. Other people treated them like animals,
but I could not let that happen, so I started a school to help them learn.
I had to spend so much time looking after these deaf children, that I never
had time to go to church. The priest told me that because of this I could never get to
Heaven, so I joined Dark-Force when I came here."
"Are you sure that was the best
choice ? You seem to have done the first two duties," I say.
"And the third," says the
Arena lady.
"How has he done the third ?"
I ask her impatiently, "and what is the third duty ?"
"The third duty is to do your
destiny," says the Arena lady slowly. Many people believe in destiny,
and many more people blame destiny when things go wrong in their life,
but real destiny is finding what you must do with your life. Everyone is
different, so everyone has something different that they must use their
Earth-Life for, and no one can tell them what it is. It is something we
must keep a look out for all through our Earth-Life, and hope that we find
it, and are able to do it, before it is too late."
The guard asks, "Do you think
that helping those deaf children was what I was meant to use my Earth-Life
for ?"
"Well," replies the Arena
lady, "you said you brought your own children up well, so you must
have liked children. We usually get some clues about our destiny, especially
when we are children, soon after leaving the Life-Before. Was there anything
in your life, maybe when you were small, that made you interested in people
who were deaf ?"
"I liked my grandmother, and I
remember helping her when she could not hear things clearly. Also I remember
feeling guilty that I was so lucky with my life, and thinking that I must
do something for other people, and then realising that I could help the
deaf children," says the guard. "Do you think that was my destiny
?"
"I think so," says the Arena
lady.
The guard does not want to talk with
us anymore, because another guard has come to join him, but we guess he
is thinking that joining Dark-Force was a mistake.
The Arena lady turns to me and says,
"Tell me about love. That is something I missed by leaving Earth-Life
when I was twelve years old."
"Well," I say laughing, "love
is what artists and writers have been trying to show for thousands of years.
Everyone who falls in love thinks they have discovered something that no
one else could possibly understand, especially their parents."
"Why can't your parents understand
love ?" she asks.
"Well, I'm sure they do,"
I say, "but because they have known each other for such a long time,
their love has changed into being more like best friends."
"That is what it is like here,"
she says. "Love does not have the same meaning here, because there
is no physical love of course, and so we do not have the feelings of possession
and jealousy that come with love on Earth."
"So people here are more like
brothers and sisters," I suggest. "But what happens when someone's
wife or husband comes to join them here ?"
"Sometimes they are very happy
to meet each other again, but often there is trouble," she says. "The
trouble happens when someone here meets and remembers their best friend
from the Life-Before, and they lose interest in the person they were married
to on Earth. Of course, if it is the same person, they will be very happy.
If they grow up in Earth-Life to be kind to other people, their minds may be open to
recognise something about each other as a reward, but usually people do
not recognise their Life-Before friends when they are on Earth. It is sad
that sometimes, when a man's wife comes here, and she leaves him for her
best friend from the Life-Before, the man joins Dark-Force."
"I am a bit worried about what
will happen when my wife dies and comes here," I say slowly. "I
was not a bad husband, but I could have been better, and so my wife may
not want me when she comes here."
"But you had children," she
says, "that must have kept you close together."
"Yes," I say, "it did
when the children were small, but when they grew up and left home it was
different. At times I don't think we loved each other, but were just friends.
We could have done a lot more together."
"Oh," she says, "but
you will both be happy when you meet your children again. Your father was
pleased to see you, wasn't he ?"
"Oh, yes." Then I
say, "It seems strange to think that two people could see each other
on Earth, without realising that they were best friends in the Life-Before.
That must be why we sometimes felt attracted to a person on Earth, but
we could never understand why."
"I'm sure it is," she says,
"but there is another reason. People can change their character a
lot as they grow up on Earth, so that you might like someone who reminded
you of the Life-Before, although when you meet them they have changed and
treat you badly."
"Oh, yes," I say. "I
knew a woman whose husband treated her very badly. They had no children
and she could have easily left him, but she stayed with him and did everything
for him."
"She was probably using him like
a window to look back to the happiness she knew in the Life-Before, although
I do not expect she ever knew that was the reason," she says.
"So Earth-Life is the unusual
part of our whole life," I say, "and the Life-Before and Limbo-Land
are the normal parts of our whole life."
"Yes, but because on Earth we
had no memory of the Life-Before, we thought that Earth-Life was normal,
but it is not," she says. "Earth-Life is a bit like spending
two years in the army, or going abroad to do voluntary work. You are away
from home, you have new experiences and you don't have to think much about
anything else, but you know it will not last forever, and although it changes
you, you know that when it is finished you will go back to the way you
had before."
"So life without a body is higher
?" I ask.
"Yes," she says. "You
can develop yourself farther without it. You probably remember that people
who meditate on Earth always try to get free from their body. Life with
a body is like having to use a walking stick all the time. The Dark-Force
people are holding themselves back by trying to gain control of Earth-Life
bodies."
"But we need a body to have children,"
I say.
"True," she says, "but
why do people have to be born as babies ? We were grown up in the Life-Before,
so why can't we start our life on Earth as grown ups ? We could still have
to die to come here to Limbo-Land. Having to grow up on Earth seems such
a lot of wasted effort. Perhaps it is to keep husband and wife closer together,
or maybe because there would be too many people if we all left the Life-Before
at the same time."
"Yes, having to grow up controls
how fast people come to Earth," I say, and she nods in agreement.
I think about having to grow up and
then I say, "Certainly, it would be much easier if we started our
Earth-Life as grown up people, but then our parents would not have the
experience of raising us. Perhaps that is an experience that people need.
Also, when we teach our children, we think of all the things we have learned
and experienced in our own lives, and then we sort through them and give
the best advice to our children. This way, the best things continue to
the next generation, and the other things are forgotten."
"That is a very good idea,"
she says, "and that explains something else, which I don't imagine
you have thought about. You know that Limbo-Land does not last forever,
and that one day we must be judged. We will be judged on how well we did
the three duties, in the Life-Before, on Earth and here in Limbo-Land.
If our judgement is good, we will go to Heaven. But what is Heaven ? Surely
it is not a place where we do nothing. I think that if we get to Heaven,
we will find that it is as if we had completed the first of a new set of duties,
call it the first big duty - being a good person."
"Does that mean that there will
be a second big duty ?" I ask.
"There must be," she says,
"and a big third duty, but I have no ideas about that."
"What do you think the big second
duty is then," I ask.
"Well," she says, "the
small second duty is to repay our Earth-Life debt by having children, so
the big second duty could be to repay the debt of having the sequence of Life-Before,
and an Earth-Life and so on."
"Do you have any ideas about what the 'big debt' might be ?" I ask. "You seem to have thought about it a lot."
"Well, we might somehow have to create
a Life-Before and an Earth-Life and so on for some other people, and they
will be like our children."
"So that we can see how they develop
their characters," I suggest.
"Which would be really exciting
!" she says.
"I wonder if we would do that
on our own, or in pairs, like parents ?" I ask. "And if there
is a big third duty, there must some special way each of us must do all
this, different to how other people would do it. I suppose there must be
the final Heaven after that, wow !"
"We really don't know," she
says, "but one thing about the third duty, the small third duty, is
that we are told what our destiny is just before we start Earth-Life, maybe
to help us get some ideas, but we are not able to tell any of our Life-Before
friends before we leave."
"Ah," I say, "that is
probably so that no one can tell us what our destiny is. If we told a friend
in the Life-Before, and then our friend went to Earth, but come to Limbo-Land
before us, they would be able to think backwards to find it, and then tell
us our destiny from the Arena while we were still on Earth."
"Oh, yes," she says, "that
must be why it is done that way."
"Do you think it is fair that
someone on Earth can be helped by someone here using the Arena," I
ask.
"I sometimes wonder about that,"
she says. "Here we naturally want to help our friends, but we can
only suggest ideas and warn people, they are still free to choose, and
Earth-Life is still a test. Also we can only help the people who know how
to listen well. I think it is good to help those people, because they are
the good people who help all the other people against the bad ideas from
Dark-Force."
"Can people on Earth know when
there have been many good ideas from here ?" I ask.
"If you think back in history,"
she says, "you will find that there were good times on Earth, and
then bad times. About two thousand five hundred years ago there was a Golden
Age of peace and many new ideas about philosophy and poetry and so on,
in different countries a long way from each other like China, India and
Greece. About a thousand years later there was a lot of fighting, and civilisation
did not progress much for about five hundred years. Then about five hundred
years after that there was the start of great progress."
I am tired after all this talking,
but suddenly I hear a lot of shouting. Many of the guards are shouting
at the guard who killed the children. The guard who helped the deaf children
shouts, "You tricked us with lies. You are jealous because you were
bad in your Earth-Life, and we were not. We do not need to belong to Dark-Force,
and so we are leaving you. You can go back to Dark Mountain on your own."
There is a lot of confusion, and many
more people leave Dark-Force, and the rest return to Dark Mountain. Soon
there is peace around the Arena again, and many people come, and everyone
is happy again.
When it is quiet, I ask the Arena lady,
"Now please tell me how they caught you."
"It was because of you,"
she says, smiling.
"Me ?" I ask. "How could
it have been me. I never thought about you. I only thought about little
things, as you said."
"I heard you thinking backwards,
and you got back to your Life-Before," she says.
"Yes, that's right," I say.
"I remembered I was in a lot of trouble and then I heard the guards
shouting that they had found you."
"Don't you understand ?"
she asks. "You had thought back to a farewell party for your best
friend who was leaving for Earth-Life, hadn't you ?"
"Yes," I say.
"Well," she says, "the
guards were listening and they heard you thinking of your friend's name
- my name."
"You ?" I ask, very surprised.
"Were you my best friend in the Life-Before ?"
"Think back farther," she
says, smiling, "you will remember everything. It's all in the past.
Nothing can change that, but please don't be angry because I didn't tell
you when you first came here. I wanted to see my best friend finding things
out for himself. And another thing, don't think to say that special word
- it's unlucky here, just say that we like each other very much,"
and she gives me the feeling of a goodnight kiss.
"Next day the Arena lady says,
"Now it is your turn to tell me everything that happened after I left the Life-Before
to go to Earth-Life."
I try thinking backwards again, and it is
easier now because I have already done it, so I explain. "I was very unhappy after you went
to Earth-Life. All I could think of was getting to Earth-Life as soon as possible
to join you."
"So, what did you do ?" she asks.
"I asked the authorities who regulate when you go to Earth-Life. They said that the
planned order could not be changed and afterwards
I realised that asking them had been a mistake,
Then I met someone who was frightened about going to Earth-Life.
He knew he would soon have to leave for Earth-Life but he wanted to stay in the comfort of
the Life-Before for as long as possible, because he worried that he would not be
able to cope with all the pressures in Earth-Life."
"So, I suppose you tried to change places."
"Yes, but I was caught. When they remembered that I had wanted to follow you
they decided I must be punished. They decided to send me to a different part of
Earth, so that I would never meet you.
They also explained that my choice of us both being in Earth-Life at the same time
would also act as part of the punishment,
because we would probably die and get to Limbo-Land at roughly the same time, and so
neither of us would have much time to communicate with the other who was still in
their Earth-Life."
"But it didn't work out as they expected," says the Arena lady, "because I died when I was
a little girl, and so I had a long time in Limbo-Land while you were still in Earth-Life."
"Although," I say, "there was not much advantage in that because we never really communicated."
"You should have waited," says the Arena lady rather angrilly. "Their plans are always
for the best, and I'm sure we would have both been sent to the same part of Earth,
and so met each other."
"Yes, but I hoped to find you and marry you. That is why I was in such a hurry,
because I knew that a woman rarely marries a man who is much younger than her."
"You should have had faith in their plan for us. If you had waited till it was your
proper time to go to Earth-Life I'm sure we would have met."
"But by then you would have married someone else," I exclaim.
"Yes, but don't you see, my darling, I would not have been your wife. I would have been
your mother."